How to Stop the Holiday Money Spiral (Without Losing the Magic)
“You don’t have to go broke to show love during the holidays. You’re allowed to set boundaries, honor your budget and still be the loving, generous person you are.” - Erika Dox-Martinez
Hello Holiday Season! 🎁
If the holidays always leave you with a financial “hangover” in the new year, you’re not alone.
For many women, the holiday money spiral is real.
Extra gifts and white elephants
Extra traveling and unexpected trips
Extra events, holiday parties and dinners
And then in January: extra stress, extra guilt, and a credit card balance you don’t even want to look at.
Who else is feeling this?
And it’s not because you’re "bad" with money.
It’s because you’ve been taught to give, to show up, and to stretch yourself... often at your own expense (emotionally and financially).
But here’s what I want you to know:
You can enjoy the season, be generous, and still protect your bank account.
This guide will show you how to stop the holiday money spiral without losing the magic of the season.
✨ Why the Holiday Money Spiral Happens ✨
Life is already full with work, family, travel, responsibilities, endless to-do lists.
Then the holidays arrive with their own layer of expectations and pressure.
If you’re honest, you might notice a pattern:
You promise yourself you’ll “keep it simple this year”…
You start shopping without a real plan…
You say yes to every event, gift exchange, and last-minute invite…
You tell yourself, “I’ll figure it out in January.”
And then January comes and instead of feeling refreshed, you feel behind.
Waiting to “deal with it later” doesn’t just delay the inevitable stress, it costs you peace of mind, savings, and the chance to build long-term financial bliss.
But imagine starting January feeling calm, proud of how you handled the holidays, and actually on track with your money goals.
That’s what we’re working toward here with just a few intentional shifts:
1. Start With Your Big Picture, Not the Gift List
Most people start the holidays by asking, “Who do I need to buy for?”
Instead, start by asking: “How much can I spend on all the holiday things without hurting myself financially or going into more debt?"
This is where you zoom out and look at your big financial picture:
Remember to keep in mind what financial goals you’re protecting too (paying off a credit card, building your emergency fund, saving for a trip, investing or building wealth, etc.)
From there, decide your total holiday spending number.
This is your ceiling. It's not a suggestion, but a boundary!
Then break that total into categories so your holiday budget is clear:
Gifts (see #2)
Food and hosting
Traveling expenses
Experiences (traditions, events, outings)
“Extras” (decor, wrapping paper, last-minute buys)
When you see the full picture, it’s easier to say yes and no with intention and avoid slipping back into holiday overspending.
2. Create a Realistic Gift List That Matches Your Budget
Once you know your total holiday number and how much of it is going toward gifts, get clear on who you’re actually buying for and how much you can spend on each person.
This is where many women get pulled into the holiday money spiral—by trying to give beyond what their budget can hold.
Remember:
Keep it real, not aspirational
This isn’t about who you love more
It’s about being honest with your numbers
Write out your list and assign a dollar amount to each person. Adjust your list until the total stays within your gift budget.
The goal: A clear list of who you’re buying for and how much you’ll spend on each person before you start shopping—so you’re following a plan, not your impulses.
This takes the pressure out of the moment and keeps you from overcommitting when you’re in the store or scrolling online.
Being clear, thoughtful, and intentional with what you give is how you show love to yourself and others without going broke in the process.
3. Have an Honest Money Conversation When Things Are Tight
Sometimes the most powerful way to stop the holiday money spiral is with one honest conversation.
You can say something like:
“This year I’m being more intentional with my money because I have some big goals I want to hit.
I’d love if we could:
Keep gifts simple or within a certain budget
Only buy for the kids
Do a Secret Santa
Or focus more on experiences than things.”
You might be surprised by how many people feel relieved.
Most of us are carrying the same pressure and just waiting for someone to say, “Can we do this differently?”
And when that inner voice tells you you’re being “cheap,” remember:
You’re not being cheap. You’re being intentional.
You’re honoring your goals, your nervous system, and your future self.
That’s you stepping into your power, you Badass Bli$$ Seeker.
4. Choose Traditions That Match Your Values (Not Social Media)
A lot of holiday overspending comes from trying to keep up with:
Family expectations
Cultural norms
What we see on Instagram or TikTok
Pause and ask yourself:
What actually makes the holidays feel special to me?
Which traditions feel nourishing?
Which feel draining, performative, or too expensive?
Maybe that looks like:
Hosting a potluck instead of covering the whole meal
Finally setting a price or number limit for gifts in the family
Choosing one or two core traditions that truly honor your capacity
Swapping multiple gifts for one thoughtful gift or a shared experience
You don’t have to recreate every holiday you saw growing up or a picture-perfect holiday for social media.
You get to decide which traditions stay, which ones go, and which ones evolve—so they honor both your culture and your financial boundaries.
🦋 Your Blissful Vida Reminder: You’re Allowed to Protect Your Peace
The holiday pressure is real. But so is your power.
Financial peace during the holidays isn’t reserved for “someday” when you make more money or have it all figured out.
It’s available to you now in the way you plan, spend, set boundaries and honor your limits this season.
✨ Imagine starting January feeling calm and clear instead of stressed and ashamed.
✨ Imagine knowing exactly what you spent, and that it all aligned with your heart, your goals and your values.
✨ Imagine enjoying your family, your traditions, and your cultura without the money guilt hangover.
That’s what happens when you stop the holiday money spiral and start making financially blissful choices today.
🎁 A Little Heads-Up: Support Coming Black Friday
If you’re ready to release the overwhelm around your money and create a plan that feels good, I’d be honored to support you as you step into 2026.
Here’s how I can help.
On Black Friday, book a 1-1 Blissful Budget Review Session with me at a discounted rate.
Together, we will:
Review your income and expenses (without shame)
Create a Blissful Spending Plan that aligns with your values and goals
Make sure holidays and fun are part of the plan... not something that blows it up
Black Friday Offer:
$50 off the regular price - just $147
Available until Cyber Monday or until 10 spots are taken (whichever comes first)
If you want first dibs, you can access it here right now as a thank you for reading this far...
Remember: You deserve a holiday season - and a new year - where you can show love freely without sacrificing your peace, your goals or your bank account.
You don’t have to go broke to show love during the holidays or anytime.
And you don’t have to figure out your money alone, either.
I'm here to guide you to live and fund your most Blissful Vida — one intentional money choice at a time.
You're worth it!
With Love and Gratitude,
Erika Dox-Martinez
Trauma of Money Certified Financial Wellness Coach
CEO & Founder of Blissful Vida
